Irish Classic - Game 1 summary - from the crease

Although the scoreboard said one thing, the rules said another. In the biggest controversy to hit the TNHL tournament since SIXPACK’S son Joe, (quart bottle) was found to have German bloodlines, team USA has used an ineligible player. See TNHL BLOG, Game Summary Game 24-from the crease, comment #11…

RULE #1

Submit your roster with whomever you want*

*= Must have played in two TNHL games

In breaking this rule the Commish not only wasted a great effort by his squad, especially from Zach between the pipes, but he showed just how desperate the U.S. team has become. Years of losing the first game of the series only to load the bench with ringers & lose again must have been too much to take. It’s sad really, to think if the rules were never written all the Irish team could do would be to accept defeat & fight harder to stay alive in the series. But now team USA must circle the wagons & check the roster closely.

That being said, I must commend the Irish squad, facing a high powered crew from all over the world the Lads played a strong game & overcame some shaky goaltending early in the game to take a late lead. Relentless pressure from the US squad finally wore down the Irish & the Americans pulled ahead to stay, to bad they did it with a player that was illegal. Well here’s hoping that team USA plays hard this week & that they show up with guys we can recognize.

Till next week

O’SIXPACK

Irish Classic - Game 1 summary

Team USA 9
Ireland (spuds) 5

Well, what a night, the fans got a show.
Six Pack standing on his head, and blowing back wash out of his mouth. The sides where even. But the better team won.
If Crabby was there coaching maybe the outcome would have be different. I hope the "GIRLS at OASIS" where worth it. I over heard the Spud's talking about how to over take Team USA. Daddy Pat told Liam to get behind Tree and up end him. Shooter also said to Chuckie go to the net and I'll pass to you. Chuck had a look on his face, like a black man running down the street with a flat screen telling everyone he found the TV on the street.
Russ and Tommy "D" were hooking and pushing all night long, even Joey got involved. He came almost out to center ice and blocked the oncoming USA team from shooting on his precious goal. Fricker was playing like someone stole twinkie from him and he was trying to win her back.
Dennis St. Dennis get well soon we missed you.
Iceman Wilson What's up, locked your key's in the car. Call Pam and she with open the car with her phone so you can come out and play! (It's good advise about locking your keys in the car)
Dunfee, What's the deal the horses are fine, you don't need to ride them every day.
Signed a mucker on TEAM USA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


TEAM USA ROCK'S

ps. Unfortunately, crabby was not at Oasis

pss. Photo courtesy of her Buffiness

Game 24 Summary - From the crease

Well the second teamers must have been playing all season, because the squad that the darkies ran out at us this week were as good as anyone has seen all year. Five of the players were making their first start of the year, meanwhile the white team skated with most of the battle tested lads we’ve teamed up with PROUDLY all season. It was a great game, lots of action at both ends of the ice. Kilgore was amazing, I’m talking about Zach of course, and I would not have noticed his father except that he carried in a cooler. He should have carried his sons bag out after the way he played in front of him. The darkies, playing with fill ins- Johnny O’Rollerpants, Brit McGoldstien, Curt Greenshirt (he must be Irish), Wojo- self proclaimed ½ Irishman & his little Mexican friend Johnny Ness kept the play moving all night. Along with the usual outstanding effort from Jaybird (who might have some Irish somewhere in his family) & Brian “The Irish Gretzky” the darkies hung in until they were able to solve the whites nasty defense. While Crafty Kraskey & Shooter did most of the scoring for the white crew their “D” was most impressive on the night. Carl ”The Hurricane” Unger & Russ “Stud” Fury kept the speedy darkies wide all night, while Daddy Pat & his 9-foot stick created turnovers the whole game. Chuck was on time& played his usual chaotic style.

Whitey got an early lead but the dark crew chipped away & Zach “The Bonner Rock” Kilgore was on his game shutting the door on the whites. Sixpack was unable to keep up Zach’s pace & allowed the dreaded ‘next goal wins” goal as well as one after that.

The beer list has gotten a little askew lately with Tree on a coaching assignment with the Cone in Chicago & Tommy Dolan sitting out with a tailbone injury he suffered while frolicking in Asia. We think it had something to do with a caning. Anyway, Krafty & Spongie filled in and saved the night they are MVP’s in my book.

The Commish was able to find a dress & shoes to match so he should make it next Tuesday as long as he can schedule a bikini wax this weekend.

Till Next Week

SIXPACK

The Irish Classic - playing for the Cup!

Rosters are due for the Irish Classic, so named because theirs are the only names on the virtual TNHL trophy.

Note from the commish:

1. I need the Irish 9 man roster no later than Friday 3:30 pm.
2. If your not skating let me know lots of more qualified skaters want in on the tourney.
3. Lockeroom 4 and or 1 are for the All-World -Allstars.
4. Scoreboard will be on for the last three weeks.
5. Trohpy will be awarded for winning team.
6. Second place is the first loser.
7. In the event of a tie we will have a tire curling.
8. Bring beer.
9. Bring beer.
10. The "are you okay " rule still applies even though we all want the hardware.

Last three skates 8:30 - 10:00 pm. All games start 8:45 promptly. The idea was presented to have a skills competition , sad to report the Irish lacked the skill-sets to compete!

Editors Note: Beer tastes better when iced!

Game 24 Summary - Spongie Hallucinations

Well, what a night. You think you have seen it all.
The other team's goalie skates off the ice.
Was it his teammates not helping him?
Did he have to go the bathroom?
No, Six Pack is in pain. Joe "Relief's" himself by vomiting.
"That guys gets MVP, Great job Joe.

Then WoJo gets cut around his mouth, and keeps playing.
The tenasteat of our players. Both teams spilled their gut's.

Making it short and sweet: The outcome!
Dark 8 White 6

-spongee

Editor's Note: Sponge man erroneously thought that the series started last night when it was in fact, just the tune-up for the main event.

Contest: Guess the meaning of Spongee's latest creation--> tenasteat

The Spongee-to-English translator started smoking when it encountered the new word! Hmmm, maybe it means that Bob is smokin' crack again. - crabby

Week 24 Lineup

Tonight's line up 8:30 start.

DARK= Birdcage, Longpants, Doogie, Woj, Sponge, Brit,Jay, Goalie= Kim's son

WHITE= Pat, Billy, Jeff, Shooter,Russ,Carl,Chuck,Liam, Goalie=Sivpack


ALL SUBS PAY JOE TONIGHT HE'S RUNNING THE SHOW!

We could use one more sub let me know first.

-commish

crab note: picture upload not working ... I'll try later

Game 23 Summary - from the crevice

WEEKLY UPDATE

This week’s update was delayed as I pulled a double this week. I was asked to play Dennis St. Dennis Thursday night even tending his crease. The Commish brought out a stable of young talent to the Springfield Ice Box & I must say they displayed skills I have not witnessed on Tuesdays. These boys have been well coached, which means Spongie has never met any of them. They also had an usual habit of returning to their own zone to play DEFENSE; more proof Spongie has not stunted their growth as hockey players. I look forward to watching those guys win a lot of games in high school.

Now on to Tuesday, good skate, nice pace, full benches make for a good game. All I need to say is the white crew took it to the dark side; Spongie scored a goal late in the contest to bring his +/- down to around –12. Chuckie did a nice job on the ice but did not bring beer to the feet of the Commish until we were asked to leave. Thankfully, Shooter had the fore sight to provide some beers for locker room #1. Tony Soprano took to the ice trying to drum up some bets on his pony & to see if Fricker or Liam wanted to be his jockey. Daddy Pat went down like a Crabby but was able to return to action looks like he will be able to go this week. Buckets was missing again, hey Bill, if you come back we will start calling you STATUE again. Cone did not skate this week he went to see QUEEN, that’s right QUEEN, but I heard he was wearing his RUSH T-shirt. The Commish will not be there next week; I walked in on him & Shooter talking about some Gay Pride Parade. Tommy Dolan must be suffering from the worst case of jet lag in the history of flight.

Till next week

SIXPACK

Happy Saint Patty's Day!

The play-off's do not start until next week. It seems "The Lad's" for team Ireland need another week to dry-out from this weekend. Team USA can party and still open up a can of "whoop-ass" and beat the Irish potato team! All prior series have been won by the IRish so Spongee's taunt is devoid of substance

Dunfee, when is "Don't fear the Reaper" running? A "LOCK" bet is the best way to go!
Where's the drink special's tonight? Chuck owes me a round. I had the runs from that Shlitz beer.

Happy St. Pat's day

O'Spongee

ps. where's the party tonight lads?

Week 23

This week is the last late night skate. Chuck: that means 10:15 to 11:45

The four final skates will be 8:30 to 10:00.

Erin Go Bragh ... less and pogue mahone

Game 22 Summary - from the crease

The return of Sponge Bob on Tuesday was the big story of the week, scoring a couple of goals picking up a few assists, playing a sound game on the blue line. He was unbelievable he walked into the locker room like he was Flava Flave, just out with his hoe’s & a forty of OE 800. Then he hit the ice, skating like he was giving a urine sample while riding a surfboard, knocking guys to the ice like he had been out of the game for a year. A true Collingdale warrior Spongie kept track of his own +/-. Once again the goalies played to the level of their competition, I am beginning to think that having beer that readily available is affecting the concentration between the pipes. The play of Tooms outstanding on Tuesday, controlling play every time he was on the ice. The Leprechaun Line of Fricker & Liam drove the white squad crazy with a constant fore check. Johnny Rollerpants was strong for the white boys as was Chuckie.

The locker room was full of several choices, The Pope, Spongie,& the MVP of the beer list Daddy Pat all brought coolers. Once again Buckets is cursing all those extra coolers.

By the way Buffy, no I did not go home last week with a hickey, if I had Mrs. SIXPACK would not give me any hiney.

Till next week

SIXPACK

Old Time Hockey?

Here's a link to Tommy Dolan's Romainian adventure

http://avokatsomo.com/arkisto/2006/02/23/romanialaista-hockeytaituruutta

Emergency League Board Meeting

Update

Skaters and Liam's Neighbor, I was subpoenaed this morning by a attorney representing Robert Toomey and Sister Agnes. Mr. Toomey and Sister Agnes have filed a suit against the THNL for damages because of the "Robert Rule" they will not allow that name to be associated with a gentleman the likes of Liam's neighbor. The THNL has also lost its Bobby Socks sponsorship,its Boppit sponsorship, and its Bobsledding sponsorship.

Therefore we have reached a agreement and the all league mandates apply to Liam's neighbor with the exception of calling him "Robert."

In conclusion,
1. Jockstrap shinny in full view of the American League
2. Mr. Kilgore is now and will be forever called "Liam's Neighbor"
3. Liam's neighbor will not start 3-7-06
4. Liam's neighbor needs to step up on the ice and walk the talk with-out his other neighbor!

Thanks for your understanding with his important manner. This all could have been avoided if Liam's neighbor just showed up, shut up, and played hockey.

-Da Commish


ps: BEER LIST

3/7 - Tommy
3/14 - Chuck (for both lockerooms)
3/21 - Sponge
3/28 - Tree
4/4 - Cone
4/11 - Carl
4/18 - Jeff
4/25 - Crabby
5/2 - Jay

Game 21 Summary - From the crease

Game Summary

Russ played like Bobby Orr- Two goals including the one that leads to the beer

Commish – Two goals off nice feeds from Liam & Shooter, says Mick don’t make passes like that.

Krafty Craskey – One nice goal- one gift goal- & one armed robbery by Sixpack

Liam looking like Michael Flattey (Lord of the Dance) kicking away a sure goal early in the match.

Shooter –more assists than goals- he had an off night

The Pope & Sixpack played to the level of their competition

Now on to more important things, from time to time players from the TNHL may travel to some of the most exotic places in the world. Just last year Tooms spent some time tasting wine in Italy, Krafty sampled some beers in Germany, & the Cone has had more than one deep dish pizza while in Chicago. Even the Commish is traveling in a couple of weeks to ever popular Wisconsin. But none of this can top Tommy Dolan who spent this past week in Singapore. At first it was believed the trip was necessary part of the screening process to become a mail order groom. The real reason Kung-Fu went was to take part in a hockey tournament (or was that saki tournament). We have footage of his only goal

In the Beer portion of the evening….. Fricker & Daddy Pat came through with loads of back up beverages to put Liam’s mind at ease. Buckets is reading this wondering where all this help was on his week. But Russ was the star again on this night producing some of the finest refreshments to date- Great job Russ, the last time I had a bottle of Moosehead beer I went home with a hickey

Turned out to be a late night on my end that’s why I’m not checking in till now.

Till next week

SIXPACK